The Betrayal of the American Man
Susan Faludi
Introduction
Tailhook, the Citadel, lap-dancing, cigar bars, steroids, Viagra, and baby changing tables in men's restrooms. Where is "The Man Show" headed and what are the implications for male and female relationships as male role responsibilities adjust to changing opportunities for and expectations of women? Is American manhood under siege? Is there a crisis of masculinity? Do we even know what we mean by masculinity (Monday Night Football?) and femininity (Shop til you drop?) in a modern world? Susan Faludi discusses our socially constructed images of what it means to be male and female and the social forces that are operating to bring about changes in these images.
Challenges to current definitions of masculinity reflect not just perceptions of what it means to be male, but perceptions of what should be appropriate roles for men and women. Both feminists and nonfeminists, states Faludi, believe that current conceptions of masculinity assert that men are in control at all times. Feminists argue that this conception needs to change; nonfeminists believe that the family is better served if men remain in control. Feminists say that men are in crisis because women are properly challenging male dominance. Nonfeminists believe that men are attempting to maintain an appropriate system of values essential to family well-being. The popular feminist joke that men are to blame for everything is the flip side of the nonfeminist expectation that men should be in charge of everything.
Key Points
- Faludi believes that our changing perceptions of masculinity are less related to what men are doing than to what is being done to men. Men's power position is being challenged and so is the definition of what it means to be masculine. For better or worse, masculinity is under siege.
- Faludi asserts that "the masculine mystique" defines masculinity as youthful appearance, money, aggression, swagger, and most importantly, being in control of women at all times.
- When men incorporate this culture into their self identity through childhood and adulthood socialization, then threats to it become threats to the self.
- Typically, men react to threats to self through violence to themselves and others.
- Oddly, men have not revolted against social movements that find fault with the masculine mystique. They cannot without admitting that they are not in control? Men have no clearly defined enemy in the gender role cultural war. In fact, men likely are to see themselves at fault, to reject traditional definitions of masculinity.
- This "betrayal" of masculinity occurs among men as much as it does among women.
- Faludi suggests that, "As men struggle to free themselves from their crisis, their task is not, in the end, to figure out how to be masculine--rather, their masculinity lies in figuring out how to be human." Men must learn to see masculinity in their utility to society rather than the other way around.
Discussion Questions
- From a symbolic interactionist perspective, how do members of society know what is masculine and feminine?
- From a structure-functional perspective, why should people care about masculinity and femininity?
- From a conflict perspective, who decides what is masculine and feminine?
